Just a Sub

Today I got kicked in the balls.  I went to an 80+ year old wombat asking for grades for a few students new to the class I was watching & teaching for the 4 week stint I was doing.  When she asked why, I told her I was going to insert grades for the teacher.

She looked at me puzzled, and thus our conversation began: "But why Mr. G?"

I replied, "I'm in the room long-term.  Currently I'm the teacher of record."

The wombat said, "No.  You're not.  You're only a substitute.  You shouldn't ever have access to GradeBook."

I was taken slightly aghast, thinking of all the jobs I've done in the last few years since I received my degree for the field of education.  I KNOW how to use the systems, passwords, input grades, and teach and create lessons.

She looked at me as if I fell off the back of the goddamned work truck with a garden-hose and shitkicker boots ready to tend the cows and mow lawns, instead of teaching to the mind and intellect.  I felt low, like maybe I didn't belong there.

So I smiled, not wanting to argue or to put the teacher in a spot of trouble, and said, "I'm sorry.  I'll just make sure she gets her grades on a spreadsheet so she can input them herself."

Suddenly she didn't look like someone's genteel granny, but an acient, evil shark, smiling as she took me down a peg, telling me, "The only teacher of record is Mrs. X~, who's a certified teacher, and you're only a sub."

I smiled again, saying, "Thank you" and promised to get all this to the teacher immediately.  Then I left, not saying another thing about my job, my place, or even thinking anything but 'I am not paid enough for this bullshit.'

I am not paid enough for this bullshit.  I get a measly $75 bucks a day, no health and I am living hand-to-mouth, hoping and trying for the future of my dreams.  From now on I should be 'just a substitute', never checking on the In-school suspension teacher, helping with crowd control, working with kids to keep standards high, or even teaching.  For this kind of money teachers should have the work ready, not a vague concept of what they want me to teach.  I teach using PowerPoint, internet lessons, art, music and open discussions and conversations.  I can take grades, keep secrets, and stop a fight.

So why should I?  Honestly, I made a little less as a bar bouncer, and could probably get a few blowjobs of appreciation from young strippers.  Maybe a bonus menage-a-trios for Christmas, more-so than nagging and niggling and idiocy.

I AM unhappy teaching right now, simply because I don't have a certification, and I keep failing my test by 2 point.  If I want to have my test rescored by hand, then TEA will do it for $150 (whereas the test cost $175) thus I am putting in an application with the local Catholic church, where hopefully my lack of certification will not hinder me from getting a job that will pay the bills and keep me a little happier.

But no girls school, too much wicked imagination swimming with pervy ideas to work there.  ~lmao!~

Don't go to the link of you're squeamish of wickedness.  ~wink, wink!~

And no, I shan't be advertising this side of my brain to anyone.   But we'll see what happens next.

Just a sub?  Fuck no.

More than some people can imagine ... hell yeah!

Jesus was NOT a homphobe

It's 8:31 a.m. Easter Sunday and right now all over the country (and possibly the world) there are children celebrating the arrival of chocolate bunnies, candies and colored eggs and accepting small yellow chicks as presents to celebrate the day.  

But honestly, what are we, or should we be, celebrating?  In accordance to the Christian ideology we're celebrating the day Christ the Lord came from his tomb, conquering death, and showing those who believe there is life after death.  Not resurrection in a corporeal form, but in a truly spiritual sense.  It's supposed to mean we're able to receive a reward for our love and service to God in heaven, given by the Son, to those who choose to be good, to follow the rules and care for their fellow man and serve others as Christ served us humbly.

That being said, I don't think Jesus would have freaked out seeing the following t-shirt, which was recently banned at an Ohio high-school by an openly-gay Junior student.  The student had to be told to wear his shirt inside-out, and that's usually the idea when a t-shirt is openly vulgar but there are some things you can allow to slide a little bit.

Eventually, he had to sue for his right to expression.  It wasn't for shock-value or to be a trouble maker, but he was making a statement about his individuality and hoping people would accept him without question, like Jesus would have or like Christians profess to love everyone.  I would have thought this would have gone right by considering the kids listen to LMFAO and wear "Sexy and I Know It" t-shirts plastered to their bodies.

I don't want to know my 13 year old is sexy and she knows it.  That's none of my business.  I don't think it's my concern to tell someone they're wrong for being a homosexual.  I don't care.  That's their lives, not mine.  I don't tell anyone beyond this blog or a few other connecting sites, that I am known as Master, Daddy or lover ... that's my business.  His message isn't even professing to be openly homosexual ... it's just showing us a loving Christ who accepts the sinner/sin/person at face value.

 Matthew 21:31
“Which of the two did what his father wanted?” “The first,” they answered. Jesus said to them, “Truly I tell you, the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you.

The boy has to come to terms with what Christ ask us, his message of love, and care, and be Christian as well as loving.

I hope for the best in his future.  If we're so damned intolerant I pray for ours' as a society.

Venting Sadness

It may be raining in San Antonio soon, dear friends.  And this is the worst job I've had as a substitute teacher this year.  Right now I wish I could call in sick but there's no substitute for a substitute teacher, as Peggy Hill would say about her importance to teaching.

The kids just had STAAR testing, which is the new mandatory state testing pattern they're falling into for their future of conformity and dullness.  I have to work hard to keep them focused, and they don't care.  They have the most ghoulish reasons and desires for NOT working.

It's madness and makes me sad.  Many other teachers I know just do they job to have summers off and find the level of accountability that exist with the system.  I think it's lunacy and I hate it.  I don't love teaching, and haven't loved it for a long time.

 

In the morning I will have to deal with the dorks again & again.  I hate this shit.  I'm sad and I don't make enough to tolerate.  Maybe I need to change perspectives, and a friend of mine told me I need to try something else.  I am going to give the Church a chance, and see if I can work at an all-boy's school much better than with these coed nitwits.

I need to be happy and I need to relax.  After all there's only a few fuckin' things you can do with a degree in English.  Seriously, I checked and here's the answers to that question.  And that's damned heart breaking.

But I need to calm down and write more.  Make happiness out of crap and work harder.

And be hopeful.

Thanks for listening.

~~~

p.s. It just started raining.

Prom 2012

The first time should be in the back of a buggy with a girl that they think they're in love with. 

                                                                              Mrs. Kate Collingwood (The Cowboys 1972)

Yes, I've written about prom before, but I rarely touch the subject unless it make the news as it did here.


 

I wonder if Seka would have gone to my prom, or maybe Traci Lords or Christy Canyon? 

I wonder what my family would have said to me when a woman of a salacious reputation would have arrived at my door, licking her lips, smiling politely, cleavage bouncing asking for me? 

 

Recently a young man in Minnesota named Mike Stone Tweeted over 600 times for a porn star, promising a massage along with a meal and a good time.  And, he got a response.  Megan Piper, 19, a porn starlet with sexy good looks missed her prom in a transition move with her family before she became a starlet.

I don't know if it's fame someone's seeking or the chance to achieve a lofty ideal.  A lot of men can hope, ache, fantasize, dream and wish to have Angelina Jolie but only Brad Pitt is so damned lucky.  Many a man drool watching Jenna Jameson, Scarlett Johansson, Playboy Bunnies, Penthouse Pets, and Hustler Honeys but that's not to be our lot in life.

Usually those dreams end in a mess somehow.

The school-district is the one who put the reins on his celebrity date and it's made the news ever since, some for, some against the idea of a porn starlet at the prom.  I don't think it's so bad as she's 19 and he's 18, and he's (supposedly) a special-needs kid, meaning he never stood a chance with the other girls and I feel kinda bad for him.  I can't say if he's ugly; I mean to me he looks normal, but if he couldn't find a local date then I sympathize as I had to cater a date from 200 miles away, and she too, was older, 'bout the same age.

Now this isn't the first time this has happened.  In 1999 a kid called the Howard Stern show and asked porn starlet Houston, an infamous gang-bang starlet, to his prom.  And the school couldn't do anything about it at the time.  Maybe Long Island is different from Minnesota but a date is a date and a kid could always use a hot date for a memorable night.

I was an ugly kid.  Well, maybe not ugly so much as homely, pudgy and shy, withdrawn, introverted, nerdy and boring.  After importing my date I was still a virgin but I was happy.

I hope the kid gets a date.

Prom is something to remember.

Adios.

~btw~

Those of you writing to support me, thank you; your wishes and happy thoughts and warm fuzzies are keeping me afloat as I go into another long-term gig.

I am making you something cool so watch out ...

~hugz~

http://news.yahoo.com/high-school-student-uses-twitter-land-porn-star-230018577.html

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2012/03/minn-school-quashes-seniors-bid-to-bring-porn-star-to-prom/1#.T28yu9VFrKg 

http://coedmagazine.com/2009/04/27/10-porn-stars-who-gave-their-bods-to-god/ 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Houston_(pornographic_actress)

Today

Greetings Friends & Foes,

After all you never know who you're addressing in a blog.  (~wink, wink!~)  I am off from substitute teaching today, working at home, cleaning and trying to get some things in order.  One of those things is a new set of shelves, as seen here.

Another thing I am trying for is a few more songs to my collection.  After all, Big Brother is coming like a SOB and we've gotta watch what's for evaluation and what we've bought.

(Attention DORKS, that is in no way an admission; it's just a statement of fact concerning the modern age we live in and what can & can't be found on the interwebz.  Don't blame me because some tools are stealing and pinning it on the rest of us ... I'm not that brave.)

Sunday I went to visit my folks on the south side of town, and as I came off Military Dr. I saw a kid doing some painting on a large utility box; I thought he was some kind of volunteer doing clean-up, but instead he was doing wheat-paste art, and I am going into the old neighborhood to try and grab a picture of the image if it hasn't been destroyed or painted over.

Another thing that's been gaining a lot of ground is stencil art, which I think is cool when done right.  

Today I am just cleaning & storing clutter, porn and old pictures and work.

Hopefully it will be a productive day too.

Take care & God Bless you A/all.

afare24get

Happy Valentine's Day

I just recently acquired a case of Mr. Pibb (which is called Pibb Xtra) from a friend of mine who just wanted to bitch about the good old days.

I listened, got my sodas and got the Hell outta there before rain came down Sunday night.

It's a quarter till midnight.  No one to kiss, no new story to nurture, love or make me smile.

But thank you ... thank you all for being a heartbeat away when I needed you.  Without you wonderful friends, readers and innocent bystanders I'd never keep trying.  I'd just give up, fade away and let life end for me as it has for so many others.

God bless you all.

Always,

Julian

Goodbye Whitney

Goodnight, Whitney

               

I was having dinner when a friend of mine sent me a text: songbird Whitney Houston died tonight (02/11/’12).

                 

My food fell out of my mouth.  I dribbled powdered mashed potatoes, gagging slightly; wondering what brought her to this moment in her life and eventual death.  I remember seeing her on an LP cover, her gorgeous figure taking me back to being a nervous, twitching 17-year-old kid in the record stacks at Sears.  Then I spied her a few months later and shelled out $8.99 at TG&Y for the cassette.

               

“You Give Good Love” and “Saving All My Love for You”, made an impression on me and I had a slight crush on the former-model-turned-songstress.  A while later while working downtown, as my taste turned to metal and punk around my friends, I still crushed on Whitney, buying her second album in 1987 where I would also buy bootlegs of concerts and filters for a bong I shared occasionally with a friend of mine who worked downtown with me.  She giggled that I listened to Whitney and Rick Astley, and enjoyed Motley Crüe and Poison with her, trying not to be pegged into one genre.

                 

When I finally had my own CD player, a big, bulky thing in the late 90’s, I jumped at Apple Records & LP’s on San Pedro and bought a used copy of “The Bodyguard” soundtrack.  According to some legends/rumors, Lawrence Kasdan wrote the story in the late 70’s, hoping to entice Steve McQueen into pairing with Diana Ross, who was still hot after her dramatic roles in “Mahogany” and “Lady Sings the Blues”.

                 

As I read “American Psycho”, I loved the diatribes/thoughts by Patrick Bateman on Whitney’s first album, then on life in general before chopping people to bits.  (I don’t know why but I always saw Casper Van Diem in the role which was made amazing by Christian Bale.  You go over-the-top, get him!)  I wish I could go that deep into lunacy some days.

                 

I never worried about her acting, as her singing was the money-maker.  I remember seeing her making men swoon on an episode of “Silver Spoons” as she sang to attorney Franklin Seales.  Her singing on the “Waiting to Exhale” CD, made me smile to no end as it was an amazing Christmas gift.

                

 Somewhere along the way she married Bobbie Brown, who’s claim to fame was a tour called “Humping Around the World”.  She also gained a drug addiction, a horrible marriage, and a lifestyle that would make Hunter Thompson wince.  It made me sad and I shelved all my old feelings for Whitney.

                 

Now she’s gone.  

 None like her again. 

She grew up and old with me, and she died too soon.

                

 Goodbye Whitney.

                 

God bless and rest you.  This world drank your soul and your talents, and others drank your spirit and your life even before Death came calling.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whitney_Houston_(album)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bodyguard

http://whitneyhouston-site.com/the-bodyguard

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whitney_Houston

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Psycho

http://pajoyner.blogspot.com/2007/11/whitney-houston-on-silver-spoons-1985.html