Teaching IS Funny.

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"

Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.

Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?" Harry: "9." Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Harry: "36." And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.

The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade." Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions." The principal and Harry both agreed.

Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?" Harry, after a moment: "Legs." Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: "Pockets."

Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?" Harry: "Pants." Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?" Harry: "Coconut."

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.

Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?" The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied, "Bubblegum."

Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?" Harry: "Shake hands." The principal was trembling.

Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an "F" and ends in "K" that means a lot of heat and excitement?" Harry: "Firetruck."

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth grade... I got the last seven questions wrong..."

For you who love dogs

I love dogs. I miss my little Blackie from a few years back & I hope that I am going to be a better doggie Daddy with my other little angels.

Here's a few thoughts to get you through.

Blessings,




Julian

Goodbye other job

I never met a celebrity, but I have nothing bad to say about my job.



I'm making more substitute teaching, and several people are offering to sponsor my new attempt at a teaching certificate. I'm driving 80 minutes round-trip to work 3 hours, and I can't take a half day or full day job as a substitute when I have to go in at noon or 1pm or 9am till 2pm.

That's just messed up. My aunt thinks they're just trying to get rid of me without telling me to fuck off and die. Maybe so ... all I can do is my best & smile when I tell my boss I am leaving at the end of my shift this week.

Teaching won't make me any happier than retail but it will be more profitable, and I'll be in a steady spot with a simple line of days & ideas. I don't have to play "Guess the Problem" or "Do you speak Spanish, darkie?" - with the customers from Mexico.



You're to speak well of your employer until you're no longer there out of loyalty and respect. Once you leave you risk your own efforts.

Bye store. If I need a new job I'll be watching the supermarket chain locally for a cart-boy's job. Maybe ...

Thank you.






~ j ~

PowerTrip & I'm Still Here

I'm posting these 2 just to keep me going.

~ J ~






Monster Magnet - Powertrip

Who's gonna teach you how to dance?
Who's gonna show you how to fly?
Who's gonna call you on the lame-dope-smoking,
Slackin' little sucker you are?

Who's gonna get you from behind?
Who's gonna ring your little bell?
Who's gonna con you into buying a television set revolution they sell?

When are you gonna blow the game?
When are you gonna blow the screen?
When will you tell them that the crap doesn't last
And you found a way to make your own dreams

The crap doesn't last and you found a way to make yourself scream

Well I died a million times
And I picked my culture well
And I built myself a gate
They can all now go to hell

I'm never gonna work another day in my life
The gods told me to relax
They said I'm gonna be fixed up right
I'm never gonna work another day in my life
I'm way too busy powertripping
But I'm gonna shed you some light

Get down!

Who's gonna teach you how to dance?
Who's gonna show you how to fly?
When you get tired of the crap baby move over here and maybe buy some of
mine

I'm never gonna work another day in my life
The gods told me to relax
They said I'm gonna be fixed up right
I'm never gonna work another day in my life
I'm way too busy powertripping
But I'm gonna shed you some light

I'm never gonna work another day in my life
The gods told me to relax
They said I'm gonna be fixed up right
I'm never gonna work another day in my life
I'm way too busy powertripping
But I'm gonna shed you some light

http://www.darklyrics.com/lyrics/monstermagnet/powertrip.html#2

http://www.darklyrics.com/m/monstermagnet.html



VERTICAL HORIZON - "I'm Still Here"

I found the pieces in my hand
They were always there
It just took some time for me to understand
You gave me words I just can't say
So if nothing else
I'll just hold on while you drift away
Cause everything you wanted me to hide
Is everything that makes me feel alive

The cities grow
The rivers flow
Where you are, I'll never know
But I'm still here
If you were right and I was wrong
Why are you the one who's gone
And I'm still here
Still here

Seeing the ashes in my heart
The smile the widest
When I cry inside and my insides blow apart
I tried to wear another face
Just to make you proud
Just to make you put me in my place
But everything you wanted from me
Is everything that I could never be

The cities grow
The rivers flow
Where you are, I'll never know
But I'm still here
If you were right and I was wrong
Why are you the one who's gone
And I'm still here

Maybe tonight
It's gonna be alright
I will get better
Maybe today
It's gonna be okay
I will remember

I held the pieces of my soul
I was shattered and I wanted you to come and make me whole
When I saw you yesterday
But you didn't notice
And you just walked away
Cause everything you wanted me to hide
Is everything that makes me feel alive

The cities grow
The rivers flow
Where you are, I'll never know
But I'm still here
If you were right and I was wrong
Why are you the one who's gone
And I'm still here
The lights go out, the bridges burn
Once you're gone, you can't return
But I'm still here
Remember how you used to say I'd be the one to runaway
But I'm still here


http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/verticalhorizon/imstillhere.html

3 is a Magic Number for Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone!

Much Love Always,



Julian

Abstinance - Read Below

February 9, 2010, 4:36 am

What Have You Been Taught About Sex and Abstinence?

By HOLLY EPSTEIN OJALVO

Questions about issues in the news for students 13 and older.

• See all Student Opinion »

A new study shows that some types of abstinence education can work in certain ways. What kind of sex education have you had? Do you think it is effective?

A Times editorial outlines the study and its findings, and argues that only certain types of abstinence teaching work:

The ongoing debate over sex education has been rekindled by a provocative new study suggesting that teaching abstinence can delay the start of sexual activity among inner-city youngsters — if it is freed from the moralistic overtones and ideological restrictions that were the hallmark of abstinence-only programs under the Bush administration. […]

The only program that successfully delayed the start of sexual activity was the abstinence-only instruction. By the end of two years, only a third of the abstinence-only group had engaged in sexual intercourse compared with almost half of the control group. [...]

The new study will need to be replicated in older teenagers and other ethnic groups to see if the findings are broadly relevant, and teenagers will need to be followed long enough to measure the effects in avoiding pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. No single approach will suffice to reduce sexual activity in all teenagers, but the new study suggests that there is a sensible, effective way to teach abstinence.

Students: Tell us about what you have you been taught about sex, both in school and at home. Has what you have been told by your teachers and parents affected your decisions about sex? Why or why not?

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Students 13 and older are invited to comment below. Please use only your first name. For privacy policy reasons, we will not publish student comments that include a last name.

She’s Moved On

She’s Moved On

I wish I could console her
I wish I could haunt her
I wish I could call her
But she’s moved on

I’d love to know she wants me
I’d kill to know she needs me
I ache wishing she loved me still
But she’s moved on

Has she found another lover,
when her life turned blue?
Has she found another one
to say I love you to?
I think she’s moved on
I think she’s moved on
I think she’s moved on
I think she’s moved on

I wish I could leave another note
on-line, by text or even by post.
I wish she wanted me
Half as much as I want her
I wish she wanted to be in my life
But she’s moved on
She’s moved on
She has moved on

Even when I can’t …

All I can hope is that she’s
happy, and content, and loved.
And that she’s moved on